Sharing my Heart

It’s no longer unfathomable to me that humans have so many conflicts, battles, and wars between each other.  We’re all essentially toddlers at heart.  We were born into this world bathed in original sin, fraught with jealousies and selfishness.  It’s not natural for us to want to share.  It’s not natural for us to want to put others ahead of ourselves.  We have to be taught, over and over and over again, to sublimate our personal desires and practice generosity.  That is why we need a Savior – to remedy this state of sin that plagues us from the beginning.  Without an atonement for our sins, they will eternally keep us from God. 

I guess you can say I’m a bit weary lately of trying to instill good habits in the girls.  It seems like no matter how many times I show them how to share and take turns, they just don’t internalize the lessons for longer than a minute or two.  As soon as Susie starts playing with a toy, Becky tosses aside her own toy and lunges for her sister’s.  Or as soon as Becky starts flipping through a book, Susie pushes in and tries to turn the pages herself. 

I know it’s early in their development to expect much from them in terms of socially acceptable behavior; perhaps the strength of my desire for them to be polite and respectful to each other is clouding the realization that they’re only toddlers.  After all, it’s not like I’ve even mastered my own selfish impulses.  I often find myself echoing the words of the Apostle Paul in Romans 7:18-19: “I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.  For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.  For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do-this I keep on doing.”  Even once we are saved from the eternal penalty of our sins, we still find ourselves battling the earthly effects. 

So I suppose I ought to take a deep breath and cut the girls some slack.  And I ought to celebrate every little triumph over their inborn tendencies toward selfishness.  Like this morning, when Becky finished her waffle before Susie and started begging for her sister’s remaining piece.  With only a little prompting from me, Susie tore off a piece of her cherished breakfast and handed it to her grateful sister.  Nevermind that the piece was barely visible to the naked eye.  Both girls were thrilled with the exchange, as was I!