Hands-On Parenting

Late this afternoon, both girls were especially fussy and I was a bit befuddled about what course of action to choose. I could: a) continue to let both kids scream and hope they would wear themselves out (unlikely, as they had both been increasing in intensity since they simultaneously woke up from an all-too-short nap); b) pick up and soothe one child while letting the other one fuss; c) attempt the ever-risky two child pick-up maneuver. I opted for the last choice and precariously scooped both kids into my arms and tried to bounce them into submission. Unfortunately, my soothing efforts are compromised when I can only use one arm per child, and thus I was ineffectual on both counts. The girls continued to pick up steam, and I felt steam beginning to rise off my head as well. I laid them back down and decided to try option (b) – choose one child at a time. I began to assess to whom I ought to devote my undivided attention. Susanna had tears streaming down her cheeks and her little legs were pumping furiously, as if she was attempting to propel herself out of harm’s way. Rebecca’s face was scarlet with passionate anger, and had stretched herself ram-rod straight. I thought I detected a slightly higher pitch to Rebecca’s screams, which sometimes indicates she is closer to the apex of her fit and will start to de-escalate shortly. Therefore, I scooped up Susanna, who after a few lingering shudders, opened her eyes and relaxed in my arms. I sat down with her cradled in the crook of my elbow, and she turned her small face toward mine and grinned a huge gummy smile. No trace of despair was left in her demeanor, as if she had been displaying this sunny disposition all afternoon. I asked her if she felt bad that her sister was still crying while she was being held. Her answer? Another big grin.

Epilogue: Rebecca indeed fell asleep by herself, although her slumber only lasted a few minutes. But I’m quickly learning that even a few minutes of silence can do wonders to restore my previously-drained well of patience. I’m also learning that being a mom of twins – or I suspect any mom of multiple children – is a little like being a triage nurse. You’re constantly assessing who is in need of the most immediate attention, and you’ll never be able to help everyone at once. I suppose that could be why the Lord didn’t give us more than two hands: to educate us about priorities and to humble us with limitations.